It’s been a chaotic year for Debra D. Winans, the ex-wife of Grammy winning singer BeBe Winans.
Last week a judge dismissed domestic violence charges against BeBe, who was booked on a domestic violence accusation for allegedly shoving his ex-wife Debra after an argument this past February.
Despite the judge’s ruling, Debra said her ex-husband knows what really occurred and she has vowed: “I will not be silent anymore!”
Why do you think the judge dismissed the charges against BeBe?
First of all dismissal doesn’t mean absence of guilt and neither does it mean he was exonerated from his actions. But this was dismissed because of the psychologist. He had two sessions, not 10, but only two sessions with him. Not 30 days, but two sessions. He said BeBe showed no domestic violence behavior. But my response to the District Attorney is neither did the man who killed all the people at Fort Hood. They did a psychology analysis on him as well and he showed no signs of domestic violence. But the proof of the matter is that he did it. BeBe is in the wrong business, he needs to be an actor because he’s good at what he does!
I saw the letter your daughter Miya wrote to the Word Network and sent to Gayle King where she detailed her account of what she saw her father do to you. Was that letter or your kids’ testimony admissible in this case?
They would not let the kids speak. I sent that letter to the D.A. I told them, ‘Somebody needed to see this. The judge needs to see this.’ But BeBe’s people were pushing so hard to get this exonerated because they knew my Word Network interview was airing last Saturday. But I had to tell my kids because they go to school and they look at YouTube and the whole nine. But they were furious and wanted to know why their dad gets away with everything.
If what you are saying is true, do you at least believe that BeBe will learn from this last incident and be careful of how he treats you moving forward?
No, I don’t. Because nothing happened to him! There are no consequences for his actions. How does he keep getting away with stuff? Again, he’s not being accountable for his actions or his behavior.
You filed domestic violence charges against BeBe before but ultimately dropped them. Do you regret that decision now?
Absolutely! I realize it was a big mistake. At that time, all I wanted was my kids and I really believed he had that kind of power to take them from me, because he has more money than I did. It was a huge mistake! But I learned later he couldn’t take them from me! What kind of man would try to take his kids from their mother? What kind of man does that? He doesn’t even spend time with them. He doesn’t even know them. They are a part of his image, period!
The Word Network was threatened with a lawsuit by BeBe’s attorney’s on Friday Dec. 4 and ultimately did not air the interview on ‘The Lexi Show’ that you already taped. How did that make you feel?
I was so furious when Lexi told me. I was so angry! I’ve been silent for so long, now I’m fighting back and I have been for a little while, ever since the first time he tried to take my kids from me. He’s a manipulating liar. I’ve covered so much about him…he really ought to be nice to me. People know what he is. But if he could take my parental right from me, he would because he is set out on destroying me. But that is not going to happen!
In a statement released by his publicist Patti Webster, BeBe celebrated the dismissal of the charges against him.
“Even though this allegation has affected not just me, but also the entire Winans family, my children and certain aspects of my career, I chose to stay quiet because I knew the truth. To be exonerated of all charges shows the power of trusting in God, and is a wonderful Christmas gift for me and my children,” the 47-year-old singer stated.
Debra said the references to her children, Miya, 14, and Benjamin, 11, in BeBe’s statement upset her because they were present when the BeBe & CeCe singer allegedly shoved her. Additionally, Debra said the kids have limited contact with their father.
“Benjamin’s birthday was December 1. Ask me if he received a card or call from his father. No! I don’t care if he was out the country, I don’t care where he was. You don’t have to talk to me, but that’s why they have text message and emails. But he didn’t even think it was important enough. I always make their birthdays a big deal. But before he closed his eyes that night, he said to me, ‘Daddy didn’t even call me to say Happy Birthday.’ Miya had a concert at school and she looked at me and said, ‘He promised me he was going to be here. But why am I trippin’, he’s only been to one thing I’ve ever done and that was only to pick me up,'” she shared.
Winans continued: “So I saw his statement, but he will have to deal and live with the fact that his children will never forget what they saw!”
Debra shared that she doesn’t intend to dwell on the past. Her platform now is about helping women reclaim their voice.
In her debut tome, ‘Life, Altered Not Over!’ Debra deals with that subject matter in an effort of showing women “their journey to wholeness.”
Though her interview on The Word Network did not air on television, the interview in its entirety is available on YouTube.
Gospel singer Lexi, the host of ‘The Lexi Show’ acknowledged to BV Buzz that she was dismayed that TV viewers didn’t get to see her dialogue with Debra, but it was it was a situation that was out of her hands.
“Due to reasons beyond my control, Debra’s interview that was scheduled to air on Dec. 5 did not. While I am disappointed my TV audience wasn’t able to view this remarkable and inspirational story that Ms. Winans has to tell, hopefully my online viewers can view this interview in its entirety and be encouraged nonetheless. I am hoping this interview will help create a dialogue for women and men all over the world that are struggling with the same issues. I am confident that after watching this interview, my viewers will be informed, enlightened and motivated to create positive and necessary changes to overcome any and all adversities in their lives,” Lexi offered.